Chapter 92: Oh my God! Officials and thieves collude, and (2 / 2)
Back to the moment right after punishing the magistrate of Xingyang County.
After the matter was resolved, the Zhengzhou Governor came to see the old emperor, his face full of guilt. “Your Majesty, I…”
His mind was racing with terrifying speculations, from “Is someone trying to set me up?” to “What kind of grudge do I have with that fake magistrate?” Ultimately, his thoughts shifted to: Could His Majesty have a problem with me?
The old emperor sat cross-legged on the edge of the bed, sensing something was amiss. He turned his head slightly and asked, “Why are you so flustered? Am I the kind of person who takes out their anger on others?”
The Zhengzhou Governor coughed awkwardly and carefully chose his words while stealing glances at the emperor’s expression. “Thank you, Your Majesty. It is this official’s own anxiety.”
The old emperor was accustomed to his cautious demeanor but still fell silent as memories of playing in the mud together as children surfaced in his mind.
After about two or three seconds, the old emperor changed the subject. “How’s the revenue from the Han Classics Press?”
The Han Classics Press was an imperial printing house responsible for engraving and printing Buddhist scriptures, Confucian classics, government documents, and popular books like The Hundred Family Surnames.
The main press was in the capital, with branches scattered across the empire, including one in Zhengzhou.
To generate revenue, the old emperor had opened the Han Classics Press to the public—essentially, anyone could pay to have things printed.Zhengzhou Governor: “Reporting to Your Majesty, last year’s revenue was 37,500 taels.”
The old emperor was overjoyed.
Zhengzhou Governor: “…But, Your Majesty, about the Xiangyang bandits…”
The old emperor waved his hand, unconcerned: “They’re just rebels acting under the guise of the Xiangyang bandits. They can’t cause any real trouble.”
The magistrate bowed and timidly complied.
The imperial entourage traveled to Zhengzhou. The city’s most famous landmark was the Han Classics Press.
“I’ve heard the place has strong backing. As long as you pay, they’ll print anything!”
This time, they could visit openly. Xu Yanmiao dragged along a friend from the Ministry of War to tour the Han Classics Press. Along the way, they bumped into several officials.
The Minister of Personnel strolled over, his plump face radiating friendliness. “Young Master Xu, are you here to print books or just to explore?”
Xu Yanmiao replied honestly, “Just exploring.”
The minister, known for his approachable demeanor, nodded repeatedly. “Exploring is good, very good. Take advantage of this inspection tour to experience the local customs. As the saying goes, ‘Reading ten thousand books is not as good as traveling ten thousand miles.’”
Xu Yanmiao agreed politely, and the two struck up a pleasant conversation. They even toured the Han Classics Press together. As they were leaving, they planned to have a meal, but suddenly, a few mysterious individuals stopped them and handed each of them a small slip of paper.
“Gentlemen, would you like to hear the great Baiyang Cult Leader explain the truths of the world?”
The Minister of Personnel, dressed as a commoner: “?”
Xu Yanmiao and his friend from the Ministry of War, also in plain clothes: “?”
Xu Yanmiao glanced at the paper and read aloud, “The summer sun fades; the white sun rises again…”
Before he could react, his friend from the Ministry of War gasped, “You’re rebels!”
But before he could finish shouting, his voice abruptly cut off. He began scanning the area for escape routes.
[Recruiting people for rebellion right at the gates of the Han Classics Press?! How brazen! There must be someone backing them. Could it be a prince or noble?!
[No, I can’t expose them now. They’ve probably deceived many commoners, and if they get desperate… But if I just walk away, it might be too late. Several strangers are already circling us.]
Xu Yanmiao frowned deeply. The Minister of Personnel, aware of the hidden guards protecting them, lightly patted the back of Xu Yanmiao’s hand.
“Don’t worry; you have the Jinyiwei nearby.”
But Xu Yanmiao misunderstood immediately.
[He wants me to scout the situation!]
The Minister of Personnel’s pupils widened in shock: No! Wait! That’s not what I meant!
Seeing their hesitation, the rebel recruiter quickly added, “We’re giving out free eggs!”
Minister of Personnel: “We…” aren’t interested.
Xu Yanmiao: “I’ll go!”
[If scouting is what’s needed, I’ll do it!]
The Minister of Personnel looked at Xu Yanmiao in despair. Truly, his courage knew no bounds.
“Let’s go together!”
The friend from the Ministry of War gritted his teeth and joined in. “I’ll go too!”
“Where are you all going?!”
Before they got far, a commanding voice boomed behind them.
The rebel recruiter immediately took a step back.
The Minister of Personnel quickly turned around and yelled, “Qin Qier! Come here! Listen, these people are so kind! They’re sharing wisdom and even giving out free eggs!”
The general, now aware of the situation, brightened and played along. He pulled out a worn, battered bowl from his robes and scratched his head sheepishly. “Uh… free eggs? But I still need to beg for food…”
The Minister of Personnel stomped his foot. “How foolish! Can you even get a single coin in a day? These are real eggs!”
Turning to the rebel, he smiled ingratiatingly. “Brother, you see…”
The rebel glanced at the battered bowl and relaxed, slapping his chest. “No problem! Everyone will get eggs! But you’ll need to wait a bit while I recruit more people.”
Xu Yanmiao asked curiously, “You have quotas? I mean, are you required to recruit a certain number of people each day?”
The rebel sighed, “Yes, but it’s monthly. Recruiting one person earns ten copper coins. We need to recruit at least thirty a month.”
Xu Yanmiao nodded thoughtfully.
[This rebel group seems poorly run. Others rely on ideology and belief to manipulate people, but they rely on money… and eggs. Are they really a rebel group or just a shady MLM disguised as one?]
The Minister of Personnel ignored the strange modern terminology and focused on the rebel group’s weakness. This was no surprise. After all, the emperor had governed so well that the people had food and drink. Why would anyone rebel?
The recruiter returned with a crowd, looking ecstatic. “Today’s a great day! So many people joined!”
Xu Yanmiao scanned the new arrivals:
The Minister of Revenue, the High Priest of the Imperial Ancestral Temple, Marquis Yongchang, a Criminal Ministry official, a Censorate official… and several Jinyiwei officers.
“Well… isn’t this something…”
After all, they had arrived in Zhengzhou alongside the emperor, and many officials came to see the local landmarks.
The recruiter cheerfully led them to their meeting place, handed them each a small bag of copper coins, and said, “You’ll get your eggs first, but you must listen to the Cult Leader’s sermon carefully. Afterward, there will be a quiz. Only if you pass can you take the eggs home.”
The officials nodded in unison.@@novelbin@@
Holding their eggs, they sat among the commoners, behaving like model citizens. The Baiyang Cult Leader handed out not only eggs but also booklets containing the cult’s teachings.
[The printing is surprisingly high-quality…]
Xu Yanmiao curiously flipped through the booklet.
Even as a modern person, he couldn’t help but admire the beautiful printing: clean white paper, neat black text, and decorative designs of the sun, moon, and stars, with the sun prominently featured, likely symbolizing the cult.
[What the—?!]
Xu Yanmiao’s expression changed abruptly.
All the officials heard his loud inner voice, clearly shocked.
[This was printed at the Han Classics Press?!]
“Wha—?!”
The Minister of Personnel dropped his egg, its contents splattering on his shoe.
[That recruitment flyer was also printed at the Han Classics Press?!]
[Does the emperor know about this?!]
The gathered officials stared blankly.
Your Majesty… did you approve this?
[Strange! Why would he be so short on money—ah?! The rewards the emperor gives to officials don’t come from the national treasury but from his personal stash?!]
[Oh, I see! The old emperor had asked the Minister of Revenue, suggesting he consider it as borrowing from the national treasury, but the minister refused. He even resorted to dramatic crying, shouting, and threatening suicide—tsk, System, at least show me an image of how he pretended to hang himself!]
The Minister of Revenue lowered his head and used his index finger to trace the patterns on the cane chair beneath him.
Well… after all, the funds in the national treasury were reserved for national purposes—disaster relief, building bridges and roads, monthly salaries for officials, and so on. If he wasn’t firm about it, what would happen if the treasury ran out of money?
[No wonder. If the emperor’s personal stash ran dry, he couldn’t exactly tell an official who had earned a reward or caught his favor: “I’m broke; how about I reward you with a meal with me?”]
[—Wouldn’t that be the emperor essentially “selling himself”?!]
The phrase “selling himself” was enunciated clearly and loudly.
The officials present all simultaneously imagined the old emperor’s face and, just as simultaneously, covered their eyes in distress.
Author’s Note:
The remarriage of widows referenced in the story is inspired by historical examples from the Han Dynasty—
- Chancellor Chen Ping’s Wife (from Records of the Grand Historian):
- “Over time, a wealthy man named Zhang Fu lived in Hutou. His granddaughter was married five times, but each husband died. No one dared marry her. Chen Ping desired her.”
- Empress Wang’s Mother Zang’er (from Zizhi Tongjian):
- “Initially, Zang Er, granddaughter of Zang Tu, married Wang Zhong in Huaili. After Wang Zhong died, she married into the Tian family of Changling, giving birth to two sons, Fen and Sheng.”
- Empress Wang herself (from Records of the Grand Historian):
- “Zang Er’s eldest daughter married into the Jin family and bore a daughter. However, Zang Er divined that both daughters were destined for greatness. To elevate their prospects, she took the daughter back and placed her in the Crown Prince’s Palace.”
- The Emperor’s Consorts Could Remarry (from Book of Han):
- “The emperor decreed: ‘Out of benevolence and compassion, the consorts shall be allowed to return to their families and remarry, following the precedent set by Emperor Xiaowen.'”
[Thus, in novels where the emperor disbands the harem for the heroine, it’s not entirely unreasonable or necessarily a death sentence for those concubines—provided the historical setting is well-constructed.]
Women could choose their own husbands (from Records of the Grand Historian):
- “A wealthy man’s daughter from Waihuang, renowned for her beauty, married a servant. After he passed away, she sought her father’s guest. The guest, knowing Zhang Er, said to her, ‘If you seek a worthy husband, marry Zhang Er.’ She agreed, asked for permission, and married him.”
Peasant uprisings within the first 32 years of various dynasties (excluding the founding years or conspiracies by officials, royalty, or relatives):
- Tang Dynasty:
- Yonghui 4th Year: Chen Shuozhen and her brother-in-law Zhang Shuyin organized a peasant revolt in Fuchuan Mountain, Muzhou.
- Song Dynasty:
- Chunhua 4th Year (993): A drought in Sichuan led to an uprising. Wang Xiaobo raised a banner of revolt in Qingcheng.
- Yuan Dynasty:
- Zhiyuan 20th Year (1283): Over 200 uprisings broke out in Jiangnan.
- Ming Dynasty:
- Hongwu 14th Year (1381): The “Flatten King” uprising in Guangdong, involving tens of thousands, was violently suppressed by the government, resulting in over 8,800 deaths.
During the Wanli Era:
- The teachings of Xu Hongru, leader of the Wenxiang Sect, were printed by the imperial press.
- The propaganda pamphlets for the Wenxiang Sect’s rebellion were also printed by the imperial press—because Xu Hongru had paid for it.
[Historical documentation on this is lacking, so treat it as anecdotal for fun in the story.]
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