I Became the Academy’s Kibitz Villain

People often thought of villains as malicious individuals who used their abilities to commit crimes or murder.

However, the National Deer Association—abbreviated as NDA—had a somewhat different approach.

“Sure, it’s illegal, but when they say they’re acting for the country out of conscience, it makes you second-guess them.”

From an international perspective, their actions were villainous, but domestically, they could be seen as extreme patriots.

“Shintoburi” (身土不二).

If you’ve never heard of this term, you’re probably part of the younger generation. If you understand its meaning, you’re likely an MZ generation person.

If you thought it stood for “Exciting Saturday, Burning Night,” then you should stand up, stretch, and take care of your lower back—you are probably at an age where health matters.

So, what does shintoburi mean?

It was a term meaning “the body and the land are one.” The idea was that agricultural products from the land where you lived were best suited to your constitution.

From a more patriotic viewpoint, it extended to rejecting foreign imports and promoting domestic products.

“Let’s eat domestic balloon flowers instead of Chinese ones!”

“Let’s eat Korean beef raised by our farmers instead of American beef!”

“Mackerel caught in our seas are thicker and tastier than those from Norway!”

This call to favor Korean products in every aspect of consumption was akin to a Buy Korean Campaign.

“That’s ridiculous. Is everything Korean better? What is this, ginseng propaganda? How does that even fit into modern times? Everything is so expensive—just one grocery trip costs 100,000 or 200,000 won!”

“But what if it increases the likelihood of giving birth to ability users?”

“A!”

“Bi!”

“Li!”

“Ty!”

Actually, from an ability-science perspective, this argument held some weight.

“Well… A study showed that avoiding foreign agricultural products and consuming only domestic ones significantly increased the probability of giving birth to ability users.” Рäℕ∅ВĚ𝐬

“What nonsense! Does that mean that young men raised on potatoes and corn in Gangwon-do are guaranteed to produce ability users?”

“…If one out of every 100 newborns in Gangwon-do is an ability user, wouldn’t that be statistically significant?”

“How much does an apartment in Gangwon-do cost?”

After the Great Shift.

It’s as if mana infused the soil in place of minerals, and Korean agricultural products underwent their own transformation!

So much so that foreign restaurants proudly labeled their hash browns as made with “Gangwon potatoes,” prompting customers to tip generously.

This worldwide obsession with Korean products began to spread.

However, the phenomenon was primarily limited to products from the primary industry—raw materials produced in Korea.

“Let’s drive Korean cars instead of imports!”

“…Aren’t foreign cars better?”

Sure, drinking Boseong green tea might increase the chances of producing ability users. But did driving a Korean car have the same effect? That seemed doubtful.

As industries became more complex, such as in manufacturing, the link to ability-user births disappeared.

Especially for highly technical products like cars, there was no direct connection to the birth of ability users.

“How dare you disrespect the glorious vehicles of God’s Korea! You must be a foreign-brainwashed traitor!”

In short:

Korean products were associated with a higher probability of ability-user births.

In an era of abilities, fostering more ability users was justice.

Korean products were justice.

Thus, Korean-made cars were justice.

Imported goods polluted Korean soil, and the exhaust from foreign cars could even disrupt the birth of ability users.

“In any case, foreign cars are bad for ability-user births!”

This was the ideology of the NDA.

“They’re insane.”

So, I floored it.

When Chaos detected a deer ahead, I quickly scanned to check if it was a real deer or a human in disguise.

Had it been a real deer, Chaos would’ve effortlessly leapt over the asphalt overpass.

But since it was a human villain pretending to be a deer, I slammed the accelerator instead of the brake.

Naturally, the so-called “human deer” was sent flying after being hit by my car at full speed.

If they had planned to cushion the impact by making me brake sharply, that naïveté ended with them now unconscious, cradled by a Harubang.

“So, are we executing them…?”

[Honestly, I feel like it, but let’s hold off for now.]

Desmond, with a sour expression, glanced at the human deer in concern.

“Phew, thank goodness. It would be annoying if we got investigated for an execution….”

Correction.

He wasn’t worried about the human deer but rather the police investigating the car accident.

Rumble.

Thus, the Pillar Deer—or Harubang No. 2—was created.

To prevent nighttime drivers from being startled, this second Harubang was sculpted into the mountainside, holding a woman in a deer suit tightly.

“Why do such people even exist?”

[That’s because…]

Goblin explained:

“…So, you rammed into them just because you were driving an American car?”

[They won’t die; they’re ability users.]

“Even so, what kind of person throws themselves at a moving car just because it’s foreign-made? That makes no sense.”

Desmond examined Harubang No. 2 with a look of disbelief.

“They’re even wearing a costume like some kind of deer mascot. If they moved on all fours at night, people would mistake them for real wildlife!”

[These are exactly the kinds of people who act like that. They enhance their bodies with mana and run on all fours.]

“W-what…?”

[They throw themselves into the scene, but they make it look like another deer is running away in the background.]

I grabbed a tablet from the car and played a video documenting NDA-related incidents.

“Yes, I was just about to enter the tunnel! You see the wildlife bridge, don’t you? Even though it’s right there, something jumped over the guardrail, and whoa!”

A lawyer specializing in traffic accidents looked at the black box footage with a sympathetic expression.

In the footage, a shadow resembling a deer leapt out from the side, causing the car to swerve and crash into the guardrail.

“This is where the video ends. Let’s look at the car’s condition. Goodness, did you crash into a utility pole at full speed? Or did a dump truck reverse onto your hood? It’s completely crumpled.”

[Had the car’s body not been reinforced with mana, we might’ve ended up like that as well.]

“…It’s basically totaled.”

[Of course. You’re colliding with an ability user protected by mana.]

The video continued playing.

“It’s heartbreaking, isn’t it? A deer jumps out, wrecks your car’s hood, and runs off. You hear these stories all the time, don’t you? The person in the video said that when they got out of the car, they saw a deer retreating up the mountain. While there was no carcass, they suspect it might’ve been another deer that collided and got flung away. It’s a complete loss—getting hit by wildlife leaves your car damaged, and the repair costs come out of your own pocket. Honestly, if this happened to me, I’d be furious… but wait!”

The lawyer emphasized his voice as he played a different video.

“Do you see this? This black box footage was taken 30 minutes earlier by a domestic car. Do you notice anything strange? Do you see the person getting out? Yes, that’s right. It’s a human deer. Now here’s the big reveal: the victim’s car was a German luxury vehicle. That’s right. Sharp-eyed viewers might have guessed from the damages that it wasn’t an actual deer but a human—specifically, a villain.”@@novelbin@@

“…Ha, haha…”

[It’s common here. Especially if you drive a foreign car in remote areas.]

I approached Harubang No. 2 and pulled back the deer hood to reveal the person’s face.

[She seems to be around 21 years old. Judging by her mana, she’s a D-rank physical enhancement type.]

“Why would a young woman with decent abilities…?”

[Why would she do something so crazy, right? Two reasons.]

I tapped my empty wrist, indicating Desmond’s Taeguk Watch.

[One, they genuinely believe foreign cars shouldn’t exist. They’re incomprehensible ultra-nationalists. These people are like natural disasters—wild animals in human form. If you’ve signed up for the ‘Villain Incident Insurance Rider,’ you might at least get some compensation for damages and medical expenses.]

Although proving it took an absurd amount of time, you could still sue the individual if it turned out a person, not an animal, caused the accident.

“The phrase ‘a person crashed into a car’ feels odd, doesn’t it?”

[In Thailand, there was a case where a high school girl with abilities destroyed a tank. It’s not that strange.]

“Hmm. What’s the second reason?”

[This kind of case.]

I pointed at the Taegeuk Watch on the human deer’s wrist.

[Who benefits most when a foreign car is destroyed?]

“No way.”

[Yes, them.]

The National Deer Association.

[Whenever there’s an ‘association’ in Korea, you can bet there’s a company secretly funding or manipulating them behind the scenes.]

“If crimes targeting foreign cars become frequent, regular people will feel compelled to buy domestic cars…!”

[Exactly.]

Srrrr.

A sand snake controlled by Chaos slithered into Harubang No. 2’s costume and retrieved something—a wallet. I opened it and pulled out a business card to show Desmond.

“What’s this…?”

[It’s a business card from a service agency. And their employer? These people.]

On the back of the card.

Amidst several business cards from clients, I brought the one labeled with an ‘automobile company’ to the forefront.

[It looks like a subcontracted agency, but in reality, they’re employees of Haegneul Motors.]

The National Deer Association.

[About 70% of villain deer incidents are paid insurance fraud targeting foreign cars.]

And behind it all was Haegneul Motors.