Kaijin Fighter: So I Have to Make Monsters, So What?

'Well, this is a great big bucket of suck,' Zhen Liu thought to himself as he dodged and parried Abbott Longhorn's barrage of Nirvana energy-laced attacks. 'I wasn't expecting to being unable to tank these attacks for once.'

When Zhen Liu decided to turn the tables on the Silver-tongues and the fragment of Lord Smoking Mirror by summoning his zako horde, he honestly thought he was going to have a one-on-one duel with the aforementioned fragment of a deity.

This assumption came from a mix of having been constantly informed by Logos and Pathos that the deities he was familiar with from mythology books were real, the fact that he and his companions had raided what were essentially miniature holy sites dedicated to the Four Tezcatlipocas of Mesoamerican lore, and the fact that he and the literal shard of a god had spent a great chunk of time badmouthing each other in an ancient language that very few other people in the room could understand.

But alas, he had failed to take into account that the fragment of a trickster god was as tricky as the deity it was sourced from.

Which is why he was now finding himself fighting a Buddhist monk with the strength of an Aether Lord while only having a pair of proto-kaijin to deal with a horde of clones that were all twisted versions of that aforementioned monk.

Making matters worse, they were all channeling Nirvana energy, that contradictory desire for non-desire that caused both his and the proto-kaijin defenses to go haywire.

On the plus side, it wasn't as terrible as it could've been.

When Zhen Liu faced Elder Tusk, he could feel the sheer dedication the man had to the pursuit of Nirvana rolling off of his body.

This dedication was so intense that the mere presence of the man was enough to mess with Zhen Liu's head and make his stomach churn.

This effect was even worse in the Kaijin, as they were beings whose bodies were more [Chaos] than anything material.

However, this wasn't the case with Abbott Longhorn.

^Stop dodging and die already, Protector of the Archive, so that I may become the owner of the [True Words of the Buddha]!^ Abbott Longhorn roared while attempting to catch Zhen Liu's head between the bladed end of his spade.

^No,^ Zhen Liu simply replied as he dropped to the ground to avoid the attack before following it up by using Blazejudicator's flames to accelerate an upward slash of his [Taboo].

Unfortunately, he missed.

^Tsk!^

^Ha! You swing your spear like a fucking amateur!^ Abbott Longhorn taunted as he began to channel aether into his feet, shoulders, and body. ^ Now get ready to get flattened! [Enlightened Bull's Thundering Charge!] ^

[Magma Ram's Shield!]

As Zhen Liu willed his aether and [Chaos] into the form of a burning shield of magma and stone, a rather devious plan began to form in his mind. A plan that could very well end this fight in a single blow…hopefully.

…

[Milord, just say the word and I think I can bend myself so I can stab him in the dick.]

'No need to take a risk that heavy yet, Nepherage. Besides, I have an idea on how we can end this one fell swoop.'

[Oh?]

'Blazejudicator, can you try and mix the [Flames of Vice and Virtue] together?'

[You mean manifest separate instances and fire them two at a time?]

'Nope, it's going to be a little stupider and it's going to involve using two alongside the Godoku Gourd…and maybe the twins? I don't know, I'm kind of making this up as I go!''

[Ah... I'll see what I can do.]

...

Unlike Elder Tusk, Zhen Liu could feel all sorts of desires coming out of Abbott Longhorn.

Greed, lust, gluttony, violence—he could literally feel all sorts of powerful desires being mixed with the monk's desire for Nirvana.

The end result of these conflicting desires, though, was that Zhen Liu and his kaijin were only slightly vulnerable to Abbott Longhorn's abilities.

To put this into perspective, Zhen Liu mentally compared getting by normal aether attacks to getting hit with a water gun, the attacks that Elder Tusk threw his way as being equivalent to getting shot at by a pressurized acid gun, while the ones used by Abbott Longhorn were like being blasted by a firehose.

Technically it was dangerous, but significantly less fatal.

Incidentally, this also meant that the mirror clones of the Abbott were also noticeably weaker in channeling this energy as well.

As such, Corpse Doll and Porcelain Doll were actually having the time of their lives right now, making sure all of these clones of Abbott Longhorn had no chance of interfering in the fight between Zhen Liu and the real thing.

Not only that, but they were able to use this moment of sisterly bonding to polish their coordination in real time.

[Corpse Doll, behind you!] Porcelain Doll called out as she kicked away one of the clones into another, incidentally timing it just as a brick fell from the ceiling and shattered both of them. [Oh, someone is really angry up there.]

[Thanks for the callout, sis!] Corpse Doll replied as she bent backwards and jammed a hand through the torso of the mirror clone directly behind her. [Hmm.]

Seeing that her attack didn't immediately shatter the clone, Corpse Doll proceeded to swing her arm around to try and throw them off.

Sproing!

[Oh?]

Crash!

[Ooooh!]

Instead, she learned that she could actually stretch her arms out like springs and swing the impaled clone around like they were a flail.

[Check it out, sis! I got a weaponized arm!]

[We're already living weapons though.]

[Doesn't mean I can't have more of them!]

As the girls had their fun and Zhen Liu fought the Abbott, Lord Smoking Mirror simply kept watching with amusement plain in his eyes.

A couple of times during this exchange, Zhen Liu had attempted to be sneaky and have an attack go wide enough that it would "accidentally" fly towards Smoking Mirror's face.

But alas, the fragment of a god had a bit more power to him than anticipated and managed to block the attacks with a well-timed barrier.

^You know, I can't help but admire your tenacity at attempting to hurt me despite having failed to do so multiple times,^ Smoking Mirror mocked. ^ Why, it almost feels as if you're trying to purposely annoy me.^

…

[Milord, I think I'm ready, but you're going to have to open the gourd like…right now.]

'Got it!'

…

[Well, what can I say, oh mighty Night Trickster of the First Age? I figured it would make a better tribute to try and piss you off as opposed to ripping out my own heart,] Zhen Liu retorted with as much sarcasm as he could muster. After all, he was still fighting a contradictory monk. [But that's enough about me; I think we're about ready to end this fight. Porcelain Doll, Corpse Doll, get behind me.]

[Okay!]

[As you say, Caretaker!]

Evidently, Zhen Liu's command came right when they had finished wiping out the rest of Abbot Longhorn's clones, so there wasn't a big issue.

Once the proto-kaijin twins had finished moving, Zhen Liu proceeded to shoulder bump and shove Abbott Longhorn several steps back. In the process of doing so, though, he also pulled out the Godoku Gourd and immediately opened the bottom portion.

The moment he did, two strange crystals, one pitch black while the other clear, manifested from his body and immediately locked themselves into place in the Godoku Gourd's slots.

[Unending Vice, set!]

[Limitless Virtue, set!]

'Alright, now you two!'

[At once, milord.]

[Let's go!]

Shortly after, both Nepherage and Blazejudicator removed themselves from Zhen Liu's person and entered the gourd.

[Blazing Valkyre, set!]

[Hellfire Judge, set!]

[Great mix!]

'Oh hell yeah!'

Immediately hearing that particular line made Zhen Liu smile from ear to ear, because this meant the payload from this blast was going to be something amazing.

He just had had to mix it first.

[Good! Great! Perfect mix!]

[Oh boy.]

[It's good thing we can't throw up!]

Once Zhen Liu started pressing the bottom of the gourd, the crystal forms of the Kaijin and the crystals of Vice and Virtue(name pending) began to glow.

[Afterlife Shot: Pyro Remix!]

Once fully charged, Zhen Liu pulled the trigger and released a pillar of black-and-white flames that radiated a feeling of pure [Judgement].

Anyone with a soul couldn't help but feel as if their entire existence would get judged the moment they touched these flames.

And that the consequences of failing this judgement would end in smoke and ashes for all eternity.

'SUCK ON THAT YOU STUPID—wait a minute, why did Smoking Mirror get out of his chair?'

__Meanwhile, at the Library of Nowhere...__

<Okay, how many centuries has it been since we last saw Smoking Mirror?

= Long enough for me to remember that this asshole has more tricks up his sleeves than it appears. We may need to relay some orders to the kaijin on our lord's behalf.=

<Ah, balls.>