Chapter 121 121: Me And The Devil
**** Steve's PoV
'Four days.'
'Five days?'
'No... two days?'
I wasn't sure anymore. Time blurred together, hammering itself into my skull ever since this hellish training began under Arkas.
My entire body ached, every muscle torn and screaming. Pain had become my only companion.
For some number of days and nights, all I had known were the cold stone walls of this chamber and the dim lamp flickering weakly on the right wall.
It had started with Arkas dragging me to an Abomination nest. He gave me a single task—kill.
But only when I was sure one strike would end the fight. No wasted blows. No second chances.
That meant I had to fight high-level Abominations with a handicap. I had one hit. One shot. The rest of the time, I was dodging, getting slammed into the dirt, feeling my bones shatter and my flesh tear.
Again and again, I had to crawl back up, battered and bleeding, just to search for that one opening.
I lost count of how many times my spine broke. Luke had healed me more times than I could remember.
Day in, day out and only relentless battle. No rest. No mercy.
By the time I finally reached Level 24, I thought I'd made it. Thought I'd earned my class.
But Arkas had other plans.
Instead of rewarding me with class, he let me bully King as a reward, then dragged me to this godforsaken place.
Now I stood on a raised circular platform in the center of a stone chamber. Since stepping onto it, I hadn't been allowed to leave. No food. No sleep. No break.
Only the darkness. And the flickering lamp.
Gold lightning crackled around me, racing along my limbs and the platform beneath my feet. My right hand trembled violently as I gripped my sword, struggling to lift it for a single horizontal slash.
That was my task. Slash.
But the lightning wasn't just burning me, it was chaining me down. Binding my movements. Arkas had told me there was a perfect moment where my sword could move without resistance, where I could cut through the restriction with ease.
But I hadn't found it. Not even once.
Veins bulged across my body. My eyes had been open for so long they burned. My breath came in ragged gasps.
Then another surge of lightning crashed into me.
Pain.
My back arched involuntarily as my muscles seized. I felt like there was more lightning inside me than blood.
Another burst struck.
My teeth clenched so hard I thought they might shatter.
My mind started slipping.
The motivation I had when I began was crumbling away. Why was I doing this? Why was I pushing myself this far?
Just so I could stay by Billion's side? But he would stay with me regardless, wouldn't he? Even if I was just an Unawakened, he wouldn't abandon me.
So why was I suffering like this?
Another jolt.
I snapped.
"Stop it," I growled.
The lightning didn't stop. It intensified.
"I SAID FUCKING STOP!" I roared, pouring every last shred of strength I had left into my scream.
The chamber crackled with golden light as another surge struck. My body convulsed violently. My vision blurred. My sword felt like a lead weight in my hands.
And finally… the lightning gave way and vanished.
I gasped for breath and dropped to my knees. My sword clattered beside me.
My mouth hung open as I sucked in air, desperate for oxygen. Drool dripped down my chin, sweat clung to my skin, and my hair stuck to my face in damp strands.
My body twitched randomly, muscles spasming from the lingering shocks. I heaved, chest rising and falling in ragged bursts.
And then, a voice.
"You gave up. Is that all you have to give? Didn't you volunteer for this?"
Arkas.
I raised my head slightly, vision swimming, and stared ahead.
At the far end of the small room, Arkas sat on a chair, half of his face swallowed in shadow while the other half flickered under the dim lamp's light.
I stared at him, eyes wide, breath still uneven.
I wanted to cut his throat. End his life and forget this ever happened.
And then his words settled in.
'I gave up?'
The realization hit me like a punch to the gut.
'No.'
Had I really… given up?
My body trembled harder from that thought than from the lightning itself.
'Why?'
A crushing weight pressed against my chest, squeezing, suffocating. My breaths turned shallow, unsteady.
Arkas spoke again.
"Did you think friendship alone would take you far? What have you even faced together to think that's enough? Just five days, and you broke."
My head dropped, forehead nearly touching the cold stone floor.
'No.'
I didn't like what he said.
I wanted to smash my head against the ground and erase this moment from existence.
I couldn't reconcile with this, I had given up.
Somehow, this felt like a loss greater than anything before.
I had given up plenty of times in my life.
Gave up on exams. Gave up on not being lazy. Gave up on trying to rank first in the academy. Gave up on fighting the Eternals.
But never—never—had giving up felt this awful.
My vision blurred, dark spots creeping at the edges.
I wanted to scream, but my throat refused to obey.
'WHY?'
The word roared in my mind. My hand trembled as I brought it to my chest, digging my fingers into my skin as if I could tear my own heart out and find the answer inside.
Arkas's voice cut through my haze.
"Are you regretting giving up?"
His words felt like they reached inside me, twisting something raw.
"Look inside yourself. Why are you regretting, Steve?"
I sucked in a shuddering breath, but it wasn't enough.
My chest felt hollow, like something had been ripped out of me, leaving behind only this unbearable weight.
My fingers dug into my skin, nails pressing against bone, but the pain wasn't enough either.
'Why?'
The word clawed at my skull, repeating over and over, spiraling like a storm inside me.
It felt like if I didn't find the answer, I would die from the regret.
I had given up before.
Countless times.
But those moments had been mine and mine alone.
No one had known what I had set out to do. No one had seen me abandon my own goals.
This time was different.
This time, my promise had been spoken aloud.
Not just to myself, but to Billion. To Arkas.
And now… how the hell was I supposed to look them in the eyes?
My breath hitched. A tremor ran through my body, not from the lightning this time, but from something deeper, something I couldn't shake.
I had never feared failure before.
But this?
This was terrifying.
My eyes flicked to the side.
The sword lay there, just within reach, its steel edge catching the faint glow of the flickering lamp. The light wavered, dancing along the blade, reflecting back at me like an unspoken challenge.
I stared at that gleaming edge, my breath slowing.
And I understood.
'This… this is why they walked toward death with open hands.'
Why soldiers didn't flinch when staring down their own end.
Because the regret on the other side, the regret of knowing you gave up when you could have fought just a little more, was a fate far worse than death.
I clenched my fists.
I wasn't afraid of pain.
I wasn't afraid of blood.
But I was terrified of facing the weight of this failure.
I reached for the sword.
My hand trembled as I gripped the hilt, but I didn't see it as weakness.
To me, it was bravery.
I took a slow breath and pushed myself up, using the sword for support. My body screamed in protest, but I forced myself to stand tall.
Gritting my teeth, I met Arkas's gaze.
"Yes, I gave up. And yes, you saw it. But I'll make sure this moment is buried beneath the achievements I'll carve into the future."
Even as my body shook, I stepped forward, lowering into my stance. My left foot slid ahead, knees bending, sword drawing back as if to sheath it at my waist.
I locked eyes with Arkas and muttered,
"Begin."
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