My Wife Came From A Thousand Years Ago

Chapter 26: Laziness is human nature

After scrolling through the pile of photos on her phone, Zhou Suzhi had a clear picture in her mind.

Wherever she went—walking, sitting, or out shopping—Xu Qing would snap a few pictures of Jiang He. Even if she wasn’t officially his girlfriend yet, the boy was obviously interested in her.

Xu Qing liked her.

And she was staying at Xu Qing’s place.

Clearly, there was mutual interest.

“She looks quite young, eighteen, right? Where does she study?”

“She doesn’t.”

“Not in school? How could someone so pretty not be in school?”

“If she were a top student, would she even look at him? All he does is laze around at home, glued to his computer, not even holding down a job,” Xu Wenbin snorted.

“Alright, alright, I’m not sponging off my parents. Criticize me when I actually start doing that.”

“Humph! You think I’d let you sponge off me?”

“How did you two meet?” Zhou Suzhi ignored the bickering between father and son, still feeling bad for the young girl missing out on school. “She’s not local to Jiang City, is she?”

“Can we drop the sponging conversation?” Xu Qing said helplessly, unwilling to elaborate on Jiang He.

The truth was, Jiang He hadn’t figured out how to live in this world yet, and here they were trying to matchmake her already. Totally inappropriate.

After dinner, it was already nearing 8:30 p.m. The night was deep. Zhou Suzhi cleaned up the dishes and went to wash them in the kitchen. Xu Wenbin sipped tea on the couch while watching TV. Xu Qing, having lingered for a bit, decided there wasn’t much else to do and got up to leave.

“I’m heading back. You guys sleep early. Mom, stop playing mahjong every day. Look at how you’re starving Dad.”

“It’s harder for her to quit mahjong than for you to get off the couch and stop gaming,” Xu Wenbin remarked with his uncanny ability to redirect the conversation back to Xu Qing.

“Wait a second. I heard people saying your place is haunted. They even described it pretty vividly—like hearing a woman crying in the middle of the night or a ghost in red. Are you alright?”

Zhou Suzhi had wanted to ask during dinner but got sidetracked by Jiang He’s photos. Now she remembered.

Xu Qing hadn’t expected this rumor to morph into an urban legend. Scratching his head, he replied seriously, “It’s true. I’ve heard it too.”

“What? Really?!”

“Yep. Dad, you should cut my rent in half. That place is haunted. If you don’t, I’m not staying.”

“... Nonsense!”

“There was even a Taoist priest performing rituals the other day. You saw it yourself…”

“Lower it. Cut his rent a bit,” Zhou Suzhi interjected. “Haunted or not, having a girlfriend means higher expenses.”

“He says she’s not.”

“She is! She’s my girlfriend!” Xu Qing declared firmly.

“…”

…

Under the cover of night, Xu Qing returned home. Jiang He wasn’t asleep yet. The lights in the living room were on, and she was holding her sword, glancing his way as he entered.

“Why are you holding your sword again? Were you practicing just now?” Xu Qing noticed that her laptop was closed and not in use.

Jiang He moved her lips as if to say something but ended up staying silent. She got up, went to her room, and soon came out holding her clothes, heading for the bathroom.

“Why are you taking the sword to shower?”

“… I want to.”

??

Xu Qing was baffled by her strange behavior. “Wait a minute. Did something happen while I was out?” He glanced back at the door and asked, “Did someone come in?”

“No.”

“Then who are you guarding against? Me?”

“No, you’re a good person.”

“…”

Unable to get a clear answer, Xu Qing let it go. As long as she wasn’t guarding against him, it didn’t matter.

The sound of running water came from the bathroom. Xu Qing leaned back on the couch, sneaking a glance toward the bathroom door. At his age, his thoughts inevitably wandered, but he quickly reined them in, silently reminding himself that he was a proper young hero and wouldn’t stand a chance against a single punch. That was enough to suppress any stray thoughts.

Ten minutes later.

Jiang He emerged from the bathroom, her freshly washed face flushed from the steam. Her delicate features didn’t at all resemble those of a seasoned martial artist.

It wasn’t the first time Xu Qing had seen her like this, but he still found himself a little dazed. “Does practicing martial arts have beauty-enhancing effects?”

“Hm?” Jiang He was looking for a hairdryer when she turned to face him.

“You used to be exposed to the elements. Even if your skin wasn’t rough, it shouldn’t be this smooth. And you claim you don’t know internal techniques?”

“I offered to teach you, but you didn’t want to learn.”

“… Stance training?”

“Of course.”

Xu Qing was exasperated. Other people got magical martial arts by just snapping their fingers or clapping their hands. Why did he have to suffer through grueling stance training?

“Maybe you could open a beauty-enhancing martial arts class in the future. I bet… No, wait.”

The thought of Jiang He running a martial arts beauty studio vanished almost as quickly as it came. After all, so many people sign up for gym memberships only to never show up. Who would commit to martial arts training?

“Here, let me help. Long hair is a hassle to dry. Just sit down.”

Seeing Jiang He awkwardly fiddling with the hairdryer, Xu Qing got up to lend a hand. She hesitated for a moment but didn’t refuse.

“Did that priest catch the ghost the other day?” she asked softly after sitting down.

“No, it was all a scam.”

“Didn’t catch it?”

“Where would they even find one?”

Xu Qing found the situation funny. A person pretending to be a ghost asking if ghosts had been caught—it was absurd.

“You snuck out in the middle of the night and got mistaken for a ghost. There are no ghosts in this world… If there were, the first one to be caught would be you.”

“Me?”

“That’s right. You.”

“Impossible. I’m human.”

“Yes, you’re human. But who’s seen martial arts like yours? Jumping around in the middle of the night—it’s no wonder you got mistaken for a ghost. Just don’t climb walls at night, and you’ll be fine.”

“Why don’t people here practice martial arts?”

“Maybe… because it’s too hard.” Xu Qing wasn’t sure how to answer but didn’t let that stop him from indoctrinating Jiang He. “Life is good now. People don’t need to suffer through martial arts training for self-defense anymore. Everyone just wants to enjoy life. Strong martial arts skills don’t have much use, so they gradually disappeared.

“Basically, the more stable society is, the fewer people practice martial arts. Training hard to fight and show off? That’s just ridiculous. Don’t fall into that trap.”

“Martial arts are for health and fitness. Who enjoys fighting?”

“Health and fitness aren’t very useful either. I heard practicing martial arts can leave hidden injuries. Is that true?”

“External techniques can cause that. Internal styles focus on nurturing the body, so they don’t.”

“Well, most people here live to seventy or eighty without martial arts. What about those internal style practitioners in your world?”

“…” Jiang He fell silent.

Xu Qing chuckled as he blow-dried her hair. “The better life gets, the fewer people practice martial arts. People prefer to enjoy themselves. Who wants to suffer through martial arts training? That’s why I’m too lazy to learn…

“You can even see it in history. Back when A Qing defeated three thousand armored soldiers with a single bamboo sword, martial arts were at their peak. Later, Guo Jing struggled to defend a city with just a few hundred men. Then Linghu Chong came along, mastering a single sword technique without internal energy, and dominated the martial world. By the time we got to Wei Xiaobao, it was game over.”

“Why don’t I recognize any of those names from history?” Jiang He asked, puzzled.

“Uh… Those are from Mr. Jin’s histories. Anyway, martial arts are dead. To live comfortably, you need technology. If you’d had today’s tech back then, with plenty of food and money, young people would’ve been gaming all day instead of practicing martial arts. And put your sword away—what are you holding it for?”

“There’s a ghost. I’m holding it for self-defense.”

“What ghost? You’re making things up. This is all your doing.”

“I saw it.” Jiang He shrank back slightly, her voice small.

“Huh?”

Xu Qing paused. “What did you see?”@@novelbin@@

“When you went out, I saw a ghost.”

“…”