Naruto: The Prince of Lust

Chapter 262 - 262

Sitting crossed leg on the stone square, he's just about balanced on the very tip of the harpoon-like rock when he abruptly hears from below, "NARUTOOOOOOHHH!" The scream was powerful and desperate and the sudden earthquake sadly tips him over. Angling his free-falling body in the rushing air to spin, slide and hop from stone tower to stone tower, Naruto barely lands on his sandaled feet before his tall, broad-shouldered godfather grips him in a painful bear-hug.

With giddy eyes and a great big smile, Jiraiya yells, "you lucky noodle!"

"Wha-" Naruto tries to ask the excited elder but the hug is too tight. With his sandaled feet dangling around Jiraiya's shins, Naruto groans, "argg, what!"

Quick as a whip and without dropping the blond, Jiraiya goes from hugging the boy to holding him out enough by his shoulders to look him proudly in eyes. The man was beaming as he emotionally expresses, "now I know we're alike, you and I! You make me so proud!"

Gritting his teeth and lamenting the loss of his progress, Naruto bellows, "what the hell, Ero-sennin? I almost had it-"

Shaking his head so his long spiky flails, Jiraiya asserts, "who cares about that!" However, the other clones now dragging the stone slabs back up the stone lances curse the old man. Jiraiya ignores them as he begs to know, "why didn't you tell me!?"

Completely lost, Naruto huffs as he inquires, "tell you what? What are you talking about-"

"Temari-chan, obviously," the perverted sage squeals.

"Temari-chan..." Skeptical of the topic, Naruto squints as he asks, "what about her?"

Snickering like a loon, Jiraiya whimsically moans, "you two have gotten close, haven't you?" Still being held off his feet by the powerful old man, Naruto rolls his eyes as the excited Jiraiya preaches, "while some may see her actions to get close to you as a preemptive attack to neutralize your strength before their coordinated invasion of our home, the manly spirit within us clearly recognizes her cuteness is worth the risk!"

Shaking off the man's iron grip, Naruto casually lands on his feet as he declares, "that's not, at all, what I was thinking!"

Thrusting his square jaw out with his powerful hands on his hips, the old deviant contends, "you don't have to lie to me, son. Others may think you foolish for risking the village over a beauty, but I one-hundred-percent support you! So what if it might get you killed! Women have a natural affinity to be as beautiful as they are deadly." Laughing loudly, he adds, "and the more deadly they are, the more loving they can be, HAHAhAHA!"

Naruto pleads with the laughing man, "are you even listening? I said that's not what's going on-"

Leaning down, Jiraiya interrupts the blond to know, "how far have you gone? Come now, you can tell me! I'm your Godfather! Have you held hands? Petted? K-kissed?"

Waving his hand in Jiraiya's happy and blushing face, Naruto exclaims, "will you calm down and let me explain!"

Slapping the air as if he hitting any excuse out of the way, Jiraiya asserts, "bah! What's there to explain? You saw an opportunity to lose your virginity and you took it like any man in your position would. She's clearly on a mission to get close to you. Trust me," he laughs, slapping his knee. "I recognize that move a mile away with my eyes closed. There's little better treats in this world than an enemy country sending a gorgeous assassin after you. Let me tell you, it's some of the best times I've ever had!"

Rounded eyes of pure disbelief graced Naruto's countenance as he skeptically asks, "what was tou-chan thinking making you my Godfather?"

"Never question Minato-kun's brilliance," Jiraiya insists. "Before you were even born, he clearly understood how much you'd need my guidance in life. Now, as your Godfather, I need you to listen to me and listen closely. Don't ever feel guilty for accepting the bounty of what's sure to be Temari-chan's delicious treats. She's already trying to deceive you; you've earned a bit of fun for the deception. It's only fair!"

'Mnn, that makes perfect sense,' Kurama reasons from his seal. Naruto rolls his eyes as the big red-orange fox generously adds, 'finally, a reasonable human.'

Yelling, "will you listen," to both the perverts in his life, Naruto professes his true intentions. "I want to learn more about Gaara! Yeah, I thought maybe Temari was faking-"

"There's no maybe about it," Jiraiya imposes. "This close to the invasion, she has to be working you. Hiruzen-sensei can't see it because he doesn't know what's coming, but after observing every inch of- ahm, of the way she was acting at lunch today, it's clear to me she's not being genuine. The fact that she has an official dossier from the Kazekage himself only shows how far they're willing to go."

"Even if that's the case, they're the ones being manipulated, not me," Naruto returns. Scratching his blond head, he explains, "if I go to Ji-chan and out Suna now, whatever changes after that may not be the same as Naru-nii's timeline. If I want some of the good things from the invasion to happen, then some of the bad parts have to happen too."

Scratching his chin, the elders slowly asks, "hmm, you mean they won't feel guilt or regret unless they wholeheartedly fail in their attempt first?"

"More like we're getting the chance to truly understand each other, but instead of using our words, we're using our fists," Naruto explains. "It's dangerous, for sure, but it's also more... enlightening."

"It's a gamble," Jiraiya reasonably remarks.

"Naru-nii said no civilians died," Naruto counters. "Which not only means we did a good job protecting the villagers but that Suna's only focused on fighting ninja, not destroying the village. Suna and Konoha become even better friends afterward, so if anything, that's what I'm fighting for."

"Mnn, if we out their plan of invading us without any concrete proof, they can simply deny any such intentions," Jiraiya reasons out loud like a thoughtful and proper shinobi. "There's the possibility they'd simply try again later and the mistrust between our nations would continue." Turning his attention to his godson, he proposes, "if we do it your way, it's like forcing your enemy to quit; which isn't the same as losing. There's no cowardice or failure in clearing the mind by quitting a fight they were manipulated into starting. And Temari-chan?"

"Whether she's working me or not isn't important, because I'm not going to let anything happen to Ji-chan, Konoha, or Suna."

Turning to the clones who are once again training, Jiraiya asks, "you know the only reason they'd target you is because of your performance in the preliminary matches, right?" Returning his attention to the ever-stronger young blond, he adds, "it means they know you're the Jinchūriki and while I doubt Temari-chan believes she can kill you, poison will slow you down... She could also stab you... maybe use explosive tags-"

"Yeah, fine, she could do all or any of that," Naruto shrugs those possibilities off. "But... ...okay, this isn't going to make much sense, but, I have to believe in her and Gaara and all of Suna."

Observing his godson with a considerate and critical eye, Jiraiya concludes, "...Because you want to be more than allies?"

Nodding, he explains, "I get nations watching out for themselves and their interests. There's nothing wrong with that but that's not going to solve the problem. It's so easy to trick countries because we're all so divided. I want to unite the five nations way before the great war and the only way to do that before then is by understanding each other with our fists. So, yeah, I don't like that Suna is planning on invading us or that they're working with Orochimaru but we're not really friends if we can't accept them making a mistake."

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