Eighteen’s Bed

After that, someone came to our house every night. In the early morning, at irregular times, they would quietly linger by the front gate before leaving, and the housekeeper discovered them. There was no doorbell, so I asked how she knew, and she said she watched the CCTV. But I didn’t bother to check the CCTV myself. It was obvious who it was.

“I’m never going out. Do you think I’m crazy enough to go out and end up being messed with?”@@novelbin@@

To explain my situation: it’s running away. No, maybe it’s exile. Or is it more like locking the gates and holding out until the end? If you ask whether this is because I’m afraid of Go Yohan, the answer is ‘yes.’ But I knew this siege was the wisest choice. Go Yohan doesn’t respond to direct confrontation.

“Face-to-face, I’ll be the one looking foolish. Why would I bother meeting him?”

However, this siege has a big flaw. There’s nothing to do, so eventually, I end up thinking about Go Yohan.

The expression on Go Yohan’s face that I couldn’t see that day, only the part of him beneath the neck that I saw. That image kept haunting me like a ghost. I regretted not lifting my head back then. I should have looked. I should have forced myself to look, even if I had to be stubborn. My imagination bound me tighter with every passing moment.

What kind of expression did Go Yohan have at that time?

My emotions couldn’t be simply dismissed with one word. The many complex feelings, situations, and realities swirled around, like colored clay, each piece stuck to itself and not mixing. It would’ve been better if it had all merged into gray. But before the colors mixed, Go Yohan always managed to do something that disrupted it all. When the gray clay is covered with color, swirling, twisting lines are formed. Like paint, poorly mixed and sucked into a drain.

Every morning, the housekeeper would silently watch me, and after a week, she finally asked:

“Are you really okay not going to school?”

The question stung. It felt like I was being scolded, and I hurried to come up with an excuse.

“I’m sick. I have a really bad cold lately.”

The housekeeper, who shared the same space with me, must have quickly noticed my lie. But she didn’t seem to mind much. She just nodded once and didn’t ask again.