Eighteen’s Bed

I don’t really know how I came back. All I can remember is the part where the door opened and then closed. The car door opening, closing, the front gate of the house opening and closing, those moments keep repeating in my mind. Each time the scene breaks, all I hear are my heavy breaths forcing their way out of my mouth.

"Heh, heh..."

In the middle of winter, I hid in my room as if I were a pheasant trying to avoid a hunter. I buried my head in the empty refuge and felt relieved. The only difference between me and the pheasant is that I know this refuge will soon melt away.

"Of course, of course, I can't do it. No. I can’t."

I desperately searched for flight tickets, lying flat on the floor. My eyes were nearly in tears. I kept rubbing my lips with the back of my hand, like I was trying to destroy them.

"I was the crazy bastard. I was the real crazy one..."

Cursing at myself under my breath, I quickly scanned through the earliest flight schedules. My hands kept slipping and I kept pressing the wrong screens. I wasn’t in my right mind anymore.

Go Yohan is, after all, the chaos in my life. Go Yohan always takes away my control.

"Damn..."

As soon as the payment window popped up, I called my parents without checking the time. My palms, soaked with sweat, gripped the carpet.

"Please, please pick up..."@@novelbin@@

After a long, long ringing tone, the call switched to an automated message. They didn’t answer.

"Damn!"

But it didn’t matter. I had to go. I grabbed any travel bag I could see and stuffed everything I could into it. Anything that looked necessary, I threw it in. The housekeeper, who witnessed my frenzy, tried to stop me, startled.

"Student!"

"...!"

"What are you doing? Where are you going?"

Unfortunately, I wasn’t in a condition to give any detailed explanations. Like throwing a dart at a spinning dartboard with a dizzying mind, I responded urgently and directly.

"I’m going to where my parents are."

"Did you prepare this already? The luggage..."

"No, I’m going now, right now."

"Did you contact your parents?"

"No."

I stuffed things into the bag by throwing them in with my hands, pushing items off the table with my arms. I heard things breaking as they fell. My mind was in a frenzy. Avoiding the now-wet floor, I closed the packed bag. After several failed attempts, I pulled out the handle and quickly stood up. At the same time, I met a worried gaze.

The housekeeper stopped me as I was about to leave the room. Her grip on my arm froze my body in place, but my frantic judgment had already collapsed.

"I’m sorry."

I didn’t have the time or the energy to reassure or comfort anyone. Hundreds of footsteps were chasing me. The darkness of night, the despair of a fugitive running with a lantern, tightened around me. Even the breath that had been forcing its way out of my mouth stopped.