Eighteen’s Bed

An utterly unexpected statement pierced my ears. It was something I hadn’t thought I’d hear, nor had I intended to listen for it. When something you never imagined hearing reaches you, your mind goes blank. What did I just hear?

“What?”

You got everything wrong on the mock exam, but you got a perfect score! That’s why the teacher was desperately looking for you. You could’ve definitely gotten into Korea University through the regular admissions!
“Perfect score?”

Yeah! But I didn’t expect you’d apply for the regular admissions on your own like this. Oh, thank goodness. You’re applying for International Relations? You didn’t lower it much, did you? Thank goodness. You applied just right. You can always take a double major in Business. Once you’re in college, that’s all that matters. Well done! Well done!
Wasn’t it supposed to be that university doesn’t matter in life? My mind was completely stunned, and I didn’t even feel like arguing back.

“Me?”

Yeah, you don’t believe it, do you? I was surprised too! You scored higher than Jisoo on the CSAT. If you had shown up at graduation, you might’ve been the one giving the last speech. Ugh, what’s with that early admission system. What a waste. Right? Actually, I shouldn’t be saying this. Is it a secret? The truth is, Jisoo was in for one year, and you were for two years. Joon helped the teacher a lot too. So honestly, I was more upset about Joon.
“No, that… That doesn’t make any sense…”

There’s no way I got a perfect score... In the chaos, the rest of the conversation barely registered.

I didn’t even try to process the rest of what was said. When I came to my senses, the call had already ended. I wasn’t sure if I was happy or feeling uneasy. It felt strange. Naturally, I ended up skipping dinner.

Time passed, and I took an uncomfortable shower in an awkward bathroom. I didn’t need to, but everything felt strange— the color of the tiles and the unfamiliar faucet. The bathroom slippers felt awkward on my feet too.

After showering, I lay down on the bed, trying to sleep, when I heard the sound of a child crying outside. I quickly realized it was the cry of a cat in heat, but the sound still made my skin crawl, and I stuffed my ears with the pillow. When I turned my head, the bed next to mine remained with the mattress still exposed.

“I really don’t have a roommate, do I?”

The dark night, the slightly yellowed wallpaper, the shabby window, and the chilling cries— everything was new.

I squeezed my eyes shut under the blanket. Eventually, I couldn’t take it anymore and grabbed my earphones, plugging them into my ears. I played a deliberately loud song, closing my eyes.

Then, that nightmarish feeling surfaced again. Like a child searching for a mother’s milk, I bit my finger horizontally. The second joint of my index finger was torn apart, leaving scars. But it felt just like the sensation of cracked lips, and sometimes, that made it even more torturous.

“…Damn.”

And that night, I realized in my agony.

I still hadn’t healed from the illness called "Go Yohan."

****@@novelbin@@

Thanks to that, I entered the first class after staying up all night. I spent time on the bed without checking the clock, and suddenly, my schedule popped into my mind. I jumped up in a hurry. I was crazy, I was crazy. Rushing to the lecture hall, it was already full, and the professor was finishing up his preparations to leave. Trying to suppress my breath, I quickly scanned the room.