Heretical Fishing

Book 4: Chapter 30: Love of the Game

It was a beautiful night on the shores of Tropica. There wasn’t a cloud in the sky, the stars above shone bright, and I could see the well-lit faces of dozens of my closest friends. Unfortunately, the reason for their faces being so well lit was a gods-damned raccoon emitting more lightning boltsthan a tropical thunderstorm.

My will was still pushed to its limit, and I wasn’t sure that I could respond in time to shield everyone. Thankfully, my friends were ready.

Roger sliced forward like a blade, his chi prepared to cut through any bolts approaching the unascended. Deklan and Dom threw shields in every direction, protecting anyone that was too far for Roger to defend. But none of their efforts were necessary.

Corporal Claws, the former maiden of the forest and current conqueror of the elements, appeared in a flash. She drew the currents into herself, acting as a lightning rod that thirsted for every last watt. Even with my senses somewhat dulled from overuse, I could feel something offered to the raccoon’s forming core in exchange for the essence Claws took. My favorite otter—though I was seriously starting to second-guess that title—halted the stream. She chirped a single time, the question clear. The raccoon, of his own volition and somehow possessing enough intelligence to reply, nodded.

The damned thing consented.

The flow resumed, lightning swapped for whatever Claws was offering. It stabilized the raccoon’s cultivation in a matter of seconds. The electricity stopped flowing out, instead condensing into a smaller and smaller ball. There, as a constantly shifting sphere, I felt his chi.

The only other time I had sensed the quality of someone’s before they ascended was George and Geraldine. The two’s essence was that of the deep abyss, which I’d assumed was only possible because they followed the teachings of an ancient manual. It had taken them months to get to that point.

The raccoon, only weeks old, had accomplished the same. Worse, the damn thing’s chi felt exactly like Corporal Claws’s. What had she done...?

Unable to stop the transformation, I was forced to wait it out and hope for the best. With each pulse of power—each expansion of the raccoon’s core—my hope dwindled. If it kept expanding…

Judging by the look on Roger’s face, he was also cursed by knowledge. He’d not had a chance to fully comprehend what Claws had become, but as his gaze flicked between her and the raccoon, he made the same expression as the time Claws had left two pockets worth of sand in his hat—disappointment, anger, and acceptance. He, too, could do nothing to stop this ascension.

The raccoon also appeared to be having a terrible day; his bugged-out eyes were set in a grey-furred visage of regret and dissociation.

Uncaring of the despair afflicting all of us, Claws poured more of herself in. Despite the ridiculous look on the raccoon’s face, his body drank greedily. The newly formed core grew and grew, slowly taking over the rest of his tiny physique.

Belatedly, I wondered if I should be worried about his health. Claws wouldn’t actually put the thing at risk… right? She must have heard the unvoiced question through our bond, because she turned my way and gave me a grin that bordered on wicked.

Despite how important her task was to her, she’d taken a moment to reassure me. It filled my heart with love for my troublesome otter pal. Finally, arguably too late, I chose to accept the advancement. There was nothing I could do, so getting worked up over it was a waste of time.

The raccoon’s core flexed to the limits of his body. It warped, prepared to snap into place, and... paused. It froze there for a long moment, then started to shrink, forming an orb as it reduced in size. Claws had stopped feeding it power.

“Poseidon’s girthy conch,” I swore. “I was so worried you were about to turn an adolescent creature into an elemental, Claws. Don’t tease me like that.”

I let out a ragged sigh, adrenaline still lingering in my veins. Roger looked up at the sky and pressed his palms together, thanking the departed gods. Maria... grimaced? And Corporal Claws, one of her devious little paws touching the raccoon’s back, started to cackle.

Wait, what is she—

Lightning exploded from her, slamming into the raccoon. His core shook, then engulfed his entire form.@@novelbin@@

“Claws!” I yelled. “You furry fu—”

Boooom!

The ground thumped and my legs almost buckled.

A sound akin to a thousand chirping birds came from the raccoon as he stood on his haunches. When he locked eyes with me, his stare no longer held the weight of existential dread. I could already tell from his chi, but that gaze only solidified my assumption. This creature was not at all connected to me. Like Rocky was bonded to Snips, this poor thing was bound to Claws.

He didn’t feel sorry for himself. The lightning-covered little shit was smiling, tapping the tips of his fingers together as what was likely some kind of scheme formed in his gray matter. On second thought, he didn’t even have gray matter; his body was just like Claws’s—made of electricity.

I braced myself as he stood on his tippy toes, stretched his forepaws towards the sky, and… yawned. He spun on the spot, making a little circle in the sand. I let out another sigh as he curled into a ball and closed his eyes.

Roger rubbed his face. “By Triton’s chapped cheeks. Thank the gods it fell asleep. We have at least until it wakes up to—”

The racoon’s eyes slammed back open, and without any warning, he rolled along the sand at incredible speed. Power roiled from him, and I realized his will was completely different to Corporal Claws’s. Her heart desired mischief and chaos; anything else was either a bonus or not important enough to consider. The raccoon’s heart, though notably unique, wasn’t at all surprising. He was a cartoonish embodiment of his heredity, the epitome of everything I’d feared would become of a raccoon upon ascension.

He was a thief.

The narrative has been taken without permission. Report any sightings.

Some larcenists, like the child that steals half-rotten fruit from a market, are in it for need. Without food, they would starve. Other thieves, such as an anarchistic college student that has read one too many manifestos, do it out of spite and rage. The latter wasn’t as sympathetic as the former, but it was easy to justify the small-scale theft of a chocolate bar from a billion-dollar corporation. It was low-stakes, too. The worst you’d get back on Earth was a slap on the wrist unless you went overboard with the five-finger discounts.

The raccoon was neither of these examples.

He was more akin to a seasoned cut-purse from your standard fantasy novel. Far beyond the early years of being just as likely to get caught as they were to get away with the coin, this professional no longer did it to survive. They possessed a cache of wealth that could sustain them for the rest of their life. Yet despite the risks, they persisted, stealing larger and larger amounts of gold—more than they could ever spend. Rather than deter them, these rising stakes only served to excite.

The raccoon, just like the metaphorical cut-purse, was in it for the love of the game.

Sand tore up in his wake as he zoomed toward us in a forward roll. Even with my sluggish senses, I could tell it what his goal was. Maria, too, accurately deduced his passage. She stepped to the side, preparing to turn and run for the object he wanted to steal. Her speed might have been enough, too. But this wasn’t a fair fight.

Corporal Claws connected to the raccoon in an instant, and their cores aligned. The stream of electricity going from one to the other burned like white fire, and as they remained paired, his eyes turned bright blue. The lightning coming from his tail doubled, tripled, doubled again—as did his speed.

I reached out toward Claws via our own connection, begging her to stop. This was going too far. In response, a false floor fell away within her. As I felt the emotions on the other side—her true emotions—my heart sank. Claws was even more chaotic than she’d led me to believe. She had hidden it from me, building a barrier to hide the depths of her degeneracy.

I’d thought she wouldn’t hurt others. I’d been led to believe that, though she loved chaos, she could be bargained with. But there was no reasoning with her now. Their connection remained solid, ever more electricity flowing into her thieving companion.

For what felt like the tenth time today, there was nothing I could do to help. Thankfully, others weren’t so afflicted. Roger had moved the second the raccoon’s core started its funny business. So had Trent, who’d rushed to defend the target. Both men arrived to either side of Maria, one shooting razor-sharp blades, the other a column of foundation-melting fire.

Maybe they didn’t know that their chi wouldn’t help. Or maybe they did, and they were willing to try anyway. Deklan and Dom jumped in too, shielding Maria and, likely just as important to them, the thing the raccoon had been racing toward this entire time—the giant fish.

It was no good, though. The elemental chi would tear right through any defenses.

Power flared, and someone I’d completely forgotten about appeared. As a light-pink blob oozed from Maria’s chest and flung himself out into the raccoon’s path, I dared to hope.

Slimes’s will was like iron, his resolve unwavering. He turned crystalline. With every fiber of his being, he knew that he could not only stop the racoon in its tracks but also send it flying. I focused, gathering what little wits I possessed to watch how the familiar was going to do it. He shifted back into a slime. What hidden ability did he possess…?

“Hiii!” he said, too fast for anyone but cultivators to comprehend. “I’m a boy and I can’t let you do that, friend! My master is quite excited to try that fish, and I must insist that you—blegh!”

The raccoon hit Slimes like a 2003 Holden Commodore going double the speed limit and driven by a bloke named Dazza. To my enhanced awareness, it was like watching one of those slow-motion videos where a balloon full of water smacks someone in the head but doesn’t break.

Slimes’s entire body wrapped around the raccoon, stretching, stretching, and then stretching some more. Only when his elasticity was at an end did all the potential energy get unleashed, and Slimes was ejected back toward Maria’s chest with a comical boing.

As the overconfident and under-delivering familiar retook his place within Maria’s core, there was no one left between her and the thief. Claws’s apprentice had his forelimbs extended, each of his little fingers ready to clutch at and yoink the fish in passing. His eyes bulged with power and knowledge, and his tiny teeth crawled with electricity—making him look absolutely insane.

Short of a divine intervention, there was nobody that could save Maria’s prize, which should have filled my heart with regret. Instead, I grinned.

Watch this Claws, I thought. You’re not the only one keeping secrets.

An expression mirroring my own appeared on Maria’s face as she pivoted on the ball of her foot, turning, but not in the direction that she’d led the raccoon to believe. It was her speed that stunned everyone now, her physical prowess even more developed than she had let anyone other than me know. Because of our spiritual bond, I knew exactly how strong she was.

Lithe muscles bunched underneath marble-smooth skin as she drew her leg back. There was a moment of hesitation, Maria reconsidering if just because she could use full power, she should. Of all the beings to reassure her, Claws trilled to get her attention. With a lecherous smirk and a tiny little nod, she approved. No longer possessing reservations, Maria’s foot was a blur as she struck.

Because I’d overextended and used up too much of my focus, I wasn’t able to see the moment of impact with the exquisite detail I desired. Light flared like a miniature sun as Maria’s limb collided with the literal ball of lightning. The next thing I knew, a line of dirt and sand erupted into the sky. Water exploded everywhere as the raccoon-turned-football crossed the river, then the gritty line returned as he continued southward. I reached for every ounce of will I had left, wanting—needing—to witness.

I caught but a glimpse of Claws’s apprentice was as he veered off the side of the closest mountain, the slanted surface a ramp from which the raccoon launched. Chittering with pure glee, Corporal Claws shot off after him, turning to give us a wave goodbye and a brilliant smile. Ever the agent of chaos, she wasn’t overly invested in who came out on top.

She, too, was in it for the love of the game.

I rubbed my eyes and shook my head, both legs wobbling beneath me. “I...” My words trailed off as I stumbled and barely remained upright—reaching for my will had been a mistake.

“What is it?” Maria appeared at my side. She could feel the disappointment deep within me. Combined with my waning strength, it caused a look of sheer worry to cross her face.

“The raccoon...” I cleared my throat and settled my weight on Maria’s reliable shoulders. “I didn’t...”

I was falling now, and Maria supported my torso, holding up my bulk. “What didn’t you do? Should I chase after it…?”

“I think it’s too late…”

“It’s not. Let me know what it is, and I’ll handle it.”

I smiled at her and gave a single shake of my head, continuing in a raspy voice, “Just don’t do it without me...”

“Do what?” She caressed my cheek. “You’re making no sense, love. What did you forget?”

“Didn’t get a chance to—” I coughed, my vision going dark at the edges.

“Take your time. I’m here.”

I gathered my strength. With a ragged breath, I forced out the cause of my disappointment. “Didn’t… get a chance to name him.”

The last thing I saw before unconsciousness took me was the compassion draining from Maria’s face, replaced by a flat, unimpressed glare.