Strength Based Wizard

Chapter 19

How to Win Friends & Level Up, Part IV (I really want this!)

[SYSTEM DISCUSSION CHANNEL: U.S.]

[TOPIC: DEAD WORLD #72]

> User: SnaggleTooth77: Holy shit, guys. Just dropped into DW#72. It’s adorable. Like Willy Wonka threw up in a forest. Even the dirt tastes sweet.

> User: CrunchyCapybara: Lmao you ate the dirt?

> User: SnaggleTooth77: I was curious!

> User: RiotLegs: Most of the natural stuff is safe to eat. Trees taste like vanilla wafers. Flowers like spun sugar. I tried a fruit, and it was like a caramel apple!

> User: Oregano: Ate too much. Got a stomachache. 3/10 experience. Would not recommend.

> User: ChadWithAClaymore: Yo this world is a chill farm spot. Almost no high level hostiles unless you go deep. Easy Shard extractions, decent drops.

> User: B0neZ: Fuck Candy Land.

> User: SwordGoth: Damn. What’s up with that guy?

> User: B0neZ: I don’t want to talk about it.

> User: B0neZ: Fuck Candy Land.

> User: SweetTooth77: ???

> User: B0neZ: Trust me. Just get out. Fuck that place.

The Wind Shards just float there, suspended in perfect little iridescent bubbles, waiting to be plucked like fruit. It’s almost insulting how easy this is.

Pop! A breath of vanilla.

Pop! A burst of spun sugar.

Pop! A faint trace of cinnamon.

I check my Inventory. 100 Wind Shards neatly stacked. Damn. Turns out I can cram exactly that many into a single slot. By the time we finish with this first vein, I’ve already started filling a second slot in my Inventory.

Clyde stretches, yawning. “Alright, next one’s just up the path. Let’s keep moving.” A piece of a root he had pulled up, which turned out to be licorice, rested between his teeth.

That’s when I see my opening.

“Hey, lemme see the map for a sec,” I say, holding out a hand.

Clyde squints at me, then shrugs and hands over the tablet. “Sure. Knock yourself out.”

I study the screen. The righthand path is clearly marked with the already-cleared Wind Shard veins. We were clearing these veins now, and the Exploration Team had cleared any mob for a good distance to either side of this forest path. But over on the lefthand side?

A couple more veins, sure. But the ‘Cleared’ markers didn’t go nearly as far.

Bingo.

“Listen,” I say, keeping my voice casual, “what if I circle back and hit these few veins in the northeast segment?” I turn the tablet around and point to where the Wind Shard veins are indicated on the map.

Clyde frowns. “Aren’t you the lowest-level User here, man? Why would we let you go alone?”

“Because this area’s safe,” I point out. “The Exploration Team already swept most of it, and it’s not like Wind Shard veins put up a fight. Unless you count my hands smelling like those bubbles for a few days. I can double our haul, no problem.”

“Double?” Clyde says, raising an eyebrow.

“How many Wind Shards did you collect?”

“Eight-one,” Clyde replies.

Veronica rolls her eyes. “We’re wasting time talking. Just let him go.”

“And you? How many?” I ask, turning to Veronica. I need to prove my point.

“Forty,” she says flatly.

“I collected 143 Shards. So…”

Clyde still doesn’t look thrilled, but he sighs. He’s clearly too tired to deal with my bullshit, which is fine by me. “Fine. Just try not to get lost or whatever.”

I grin. “Only one path, thankfully.”

I circle back toward the entrance, keeping an eye on the landmarks from the map. I’m quickly back to the point we entered the Realm. I spot the lefthand path and take it. I quickly make note of the grouping of Wind Shard veins. But I’m not here for Wind Shards.

I pluck a few, just enough to show for my labor if anyone asks.

Then I step off the marked path, heading towards the uncleared zone.

It’s time to grind some levels.

I crouch low in the brush, heart hammering as I spot my first mob in the clearing ahead.

It’s a snail.

Not just any snail, though. This thing is the size of a small dog, its shell rising up to about my knees. The shell isn’t normal either—it’s translucent, glossy, like those hard candies my granddad always had in his pockets. You know the kind. Looked like melted glass, tasted vaguely of artificial strawberry and dust, maybe sometimes caramel.

If you discover this tale on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the violation.

Its body, though? Brownish and thick. And oozing something that glistens in the sunlight. As the snail inches forward, it leaves a sticky, amber-colored trail in its wake. Maple syrup, I realize.

I squint. Focusing on the snail. A notification pings in my vision, hovering above the snail as it inches across the clearing.

Monster Identified: Hard Candy Snail

Level: 2

Classification: Lesser Maple Mollusk

Perfect. A good warm-up.

My backpack vibrates violently against my shoulders, and I groan.

“Chill, dude,” I mutter, swinging the bag off and unzipping it. Inside, Jelly Boy glares up at me, his tiny, gelatinous body quivering with what I can only describe as barely restrained violence.

I sigh. “Yeah, yeah. You can watch. Just keep an eye out, alright? If you see or hear anything weird, get back in the bag.” The last thing I needed was one of my coworkers discovering him.

Jelly Boy jiggles in assent.

I turn my attention back to the snail, stretching my fingers out. “The goal here is to level up by killing monsters. So, sit back, buddy, and check this out.”

I breathe in. Focus, I think. I withdraw my wand from my Inventory. My palm of my wand-hand tingles as I cast Wizard’s Hand.

A spectral hand shimmers into existence, floating beside me like some kind of ghostly butler, waiting for its orders. I’m relieved to see that my MP bar doesn’t drop. Good, so the spell enhancement didn’t change the cost of the spell. With my wand, the cantrip was essentially free to cast, even if I was normally limited to have only two of the spectral hands active at any time. I always have my cape if I need a third Wizard’s Hand.

I mentally command it forward. Go. Attack that snail.

It glides toward the Hard Candy Snail, slow and deliberate. I’m expecting a casual smack, maybe a push.

That is not what happens.

The spectral hand closes into a fist, and it wails on the snail.

I mean beats the absolute shit

A flurry of punches and palm strikes—the thing doesn’t stand a chance. The hand grabs the snail by its gooey eyestalks and swings it around like a medieval flail. Then, with one last sickening crack, the candy shell shatters like a windshield in a hailstorm.

I blink.

You have defeated Hard Candy Snail, Level 2!

Jelly Boy vibrates wildly at my side, having watched the carnage, emitting what I can only interpret as an excited, high-pitched hum.

I stare at my floating hand, still hovering there like it didn’t just commit an act of unspeakable violence.

“Holy shit,” I whisper.

Jelly Boy hums again.

“Yeah,” I say, flexing my fingers. “I think I like this spell now.”

We head deeper into the trees, me on the hunt for more snails, Jelly Boy pausing every few steps to sop up the maple-flavored gore like some kind of tiny gelatinous war criminal.

“You’re disgusting,” I tell him.

He quivers happily.

I spot another nest of the little bastards a few minutes later—five of them this time, all slowly sliming their way through the undergrowth, leaving behind thick, glistening trails of sugary sap. Their candy shells gleam in the soft pinkish light filtering through the weird, pastel-colored leaves.

Perfect.

I flex my fingers, summon another Wizard’s Hand, then another. This time, I let them split up—each taking on its own snail. It’s mentally exhausting, like trying to play two video games at once, but the results are beautiful.

One hand grabs a snail by the eyestalk and whips it like a flail into the nearest tree. The other karate chops straight through a shell, shattering it into a cloud of razor-sharp fragments. Another snail tries to escape—bad move. It’s too slow, even for my spectral hands, which aren’t bullets by any means. A hand grabs it by its gooey foot and pile-drives it into the ground, sending a ripple of maple syrup spraying outward.

Jelly Boy vibrates enthusiastically.

The notifications rain into my interface.

You have defeated Hard Candy Snail, Level 2!

You have defeated Hard Candy Snail, Level 2!

You have defeated Hard Candy Snail, Level 2!

Level 4 increased to Level 5!

You have defeated Hard Candy Snail, Level 2!

You have defeated Hard Candy Snail, Level 2!

[2 Stat Points Currently Unallocated. Assign Stat Points?]

I know a little more about what each Stat does now, having read various Discussion Channel threads on the topic. Even if I’m relying on my Strength Stat, I need to approach this slightly differently. I pump 1 Stat Point into Intelligence, before dropping the second into Strength.

MP: 3/3

Damn. And no New Spell notifications either…

People on the Discussion Channels had discovered that Intelligence fueled learning new, and more powerful, Spells, and was also directly tied to one’s Mana. I decide I’ll allocate a portion of each Level Up into Intelligence, at least until I learn another Spell. Still, now that at least one of my Spells scales on Strength, I can’t give up on that Stat.

I move on, Jelly Boy at my side. We need to find as many of these snails to farm as possible.

I lose track of time. Every couple of kills, I jog back to the veins and grab a handful of Wind Shards to make it look like I’ve been working. It’s not efficient, but I can’t have nothing to show for my time. “Gotta love cardio,” I say to Jelly Boy, who occupies the stretches between leveling and shard-collecting in my backpack. He gurgles, catching my sarcasm.

Then it's back to snail genocide.

You have defeated Hard Candy Snail, Level 2!

You have defeated Hard Candy Snail, Level 2!

Level 5 increased to Level 6!

I immediately place 1 point into Strength, and another into Intelligence.

Ability Points increased from 3 to 5!

. . .

New Ability Gained!

Dismember (Beginner)

[Description: You have honed your Strength. Attacks using your Strength stat have a 10% chance to cause a Bleed effect on the Target. Attacks using your Strength stat have a 2% chance to trigger a dismemberment on the Target. This effect will stack for five successive hits, at which point to chance to trigger this effect will reset. After five strikes using your Strength stat, this ability requires a 30 second cooldown.]

“Hell yeah,” I mutter under my breath, grinning.

That’s two levels since I got here. At this rate, I’ll be unstoppable in no time. And this Dismember Ability? Holy shit, that will be huge if it applies to strikes done with my Wizard’s Hand cantrip. It’s difficult to tell, but that Spell does use my Strength Stat.

I glance down at Jelly Boy, ready to gloat—but he’s already tucked himself away in my backpack. Weird.

Then I hear it. The subtle rustling of sugar-formed leaves.

I freeze, then turn around just as Veronica and Clyde push through the brush.

Veronica glares at me, arms crossed, looking every bit like an angry schoolteacher catching a student goofing off in the middle of a pop quiz.

Clyde, on the other hand, just looks exhausted. This is above his paygrade and he’d rather be anywhere else than stumbling upon me off-course, playing rogue Explorer.

“What the hell are you doing?” Veronica demands.

I glance at the gory battlefield of shattered candy shells and syrup-drenched leaves around me.

Uhh… Think, Joe, think…

“Working?” I say, lamely.

Clyde groans and rubs his temples.

Veronica opens her mouth, probably to yell at me, but before she can, rustling comes from the trees behind me.

I turn just as something massive pushes through the undergrowth.

A pig. No—a gigantic pig. It’s smooth, pink, and the size of a goddamn horse.

It snuffles at the air, snorting loudly, ears twitching as it roots around the battlefield of snail carnage I’ve so proudly created. Then, apparently finding what it’s looking for, the thing trots up to the nearest puddle of maple-syrup guts and starts lapping it up.

I blink.

Veronica and Clyde stare.

The pig makes wet, slurping noises, hoovering up chunks of shattered candy shell like they’re gourmet truffles. Gross.

I focus on the pig, willing the System to give me its stats.

A notification hovers over the beast:

Monster Identified: Bubblegum Piglet

Level: 8

Classification: Sugar-fiend Swine

…Piglet?

As in, baby pig?

I’m still processing that unfortunate detail when a new sound fills the air. A rumbling. The snap and crunch of branches breaking.

A loud, ear-splitting, spine-chilling squeal pierces the air. It sounds like metal tearing. Like someone throwing a car through a meat grinder.

The Bubblegum Piglet freezes mid-slurp, ears perking up. Then it squeals back—high-pitched, almost playful.

Oh.

Oh shit.