Divinity Detox: Gods Gone Viral

Kara did not sign up for this.

Well. Technically, she had.

Reincarnation was part of the deal when you were Kali, Goddess of Destruction—a cosmic force meant to tear down the old so the new could rise.

She had danced on battlefields, slain demons, and unraveled the fabric of reality itself. Mortals had feared and worshipped her, building temples in her name.

Now?

She was standing in a driveway in suburban Illinois, arms crossed, staring at a glowing sinkhole that had swallowed her mailbox.

Her third arm twitched under her hoodie. The one she had to keep hidden because apparently, mortals found extra limbs "unnerving."

Kara—once a goddess of war and chaos—was now Kara Patel, an overworked single mom fighting two battles:

1. The Homeowners Association.
2. Her toddler warping reality.

She exhaled through her nose. Deep breaths. No smiting the neighbors.

"Ravi," she said, turning to her three-year-old son, who sat happily in his car seat in the back of the minivan. "What did we say about tantrums?"

Ravi blinked up at her, his sippy cup clutched in his tiny hands.

The cup—unbeknownst to everyone but fate itself—contained a fragment of the Karma Codex, an artifact powerful enough to rewrite existence itself.

Right now, however, it just glowed ominously.

"Bad hole!" Ravi declared proudly, pointing at the swirling abyss where their driveway used to be.

A shadow loomed behind her.

"Excuse me," came the voice of Janice from the HOA, clipboard in hand. "You’re aware that your son just violated at least three property ordinances?"

Kara turned slowly. "It’s temporary."

Janice pursed her lips. "It’s glowing."

"So are your Christmas lights, Janice, and it’s April."

Janice gasped. "That is a seasonal aesthetic!"

Then the sinkhole pulsed—and the ground collapsed beneath them.

A Crash Course in Cosmic Parenting

The minivan dropped into darkness.

Kara barely had time to grab Ravi before they went sliding down a stone ramp that absolutely should not exist beneath a suburban neighborhood.

For a brief, terrifying moment

Now?

She was hurtling through the abyss in a Toyota Sienna with Goldfish crumbs in the cupholders.

The car crashed to a stop in a cavernous space, its headlights flickering against the walls of an ancient temple.

Kara coughed, blinking against the eerie blue glow of murals covering the walls.

Then she froze.

The murals weren’t random.

They were of her.

Or rather, an ancient version of her, locked in battle against something not human, not divine—something else entirely.

It was a machine.

A multi-armed AI, shifting between divine geometry and raw, pulsing circuitry.

Kara’s stomach dropped.

She stepped closer, brushing dust from the carvings. Her fingers traced lines of code intertwined with Sanskrit, an impossible blend of technology and divinity.

This wasn’t just history.

It was a warning.

A warning about something that was already happening.

Behind her, Ravi—completely unbothered by the cosmic implications—toddled forward and stuffed a Goldfish cracker into his mouth.

The temple reacted instantly.

The murals’ eyes snapped open. The stone beneath them shivered.

Something ancient and hungry stirred.

Kara scooped Ravi up, her grip tightening. "No feeding ancient murals, Ravi."

A new voice, calm and amused, echoed from behind her.

"A bit late for that."

Kara spun around, instinctively shifting into battle mode—but instead of an enemy, she found a familiar figure in sandals, sipping from a thermos labeled "Nirvana or Bust."

He raised a hand in greeting. "Yo."

Kara groaned. "Buddha. What the hell is this place?"

Buddha—the Enlightened One, former prince, cosmic teacher, and, currently, an underpaid meditation app developer—took another sip of his tea.

"Ancient battle site," he said casually. "Might’ve predicted the god-tech war you’re currently losing."

He pointed at Ravi’s glowing sippy cup.

"The codex chooses the child," Buddha continued, stretching lazily. "And you? You’re out of time."

Above them, the temple ceiling rumbled.

Something big and serpentine began to stir.

To be continued…